Remember the song by Madonna, which goes, “Like a virgin, touched for the very first time…”?
Well, if you want the best sex possible on a continuing basis, I highly recommend you try taking Madonna’s advice or adopt a Zen “beginner’s mind” into your sexual experience, alone or with a partner!
Leave your expectations or comparisons with past experience outside the bedroom door, and forget any goal! A virginal experience is ripe with anticipation, not knowing what will happen or what it will feel like – until it does.
Before we have known loss, rejection, disappointment, or frustration, we come to the erotic or sexual encounter open and fresh and vulnerable. Then, over time, we tend to unconsciously become more protective and limit our vulnerability, which we have learned can result in pain.
But the same vulnerability can also open us to exquisite pleasure.
In fact, as I have said before, we can experience pleasure only to the degree we’re willing to risk possible pain. That’s where the rich texture of life lies.
Even if you aren’t struggling with over-protectiveness, you may become subtly goal-oriented during lovemaking, trying to match or surpass past pleasures. This too limits enjoyment because it keeps us from focusing on the moment at hand as it is happening, which is necessary to experience the deepest pleasure.
So, be like a virgin.
Greet each touch… each breath… each kiss…
…as the exquisite brand new experience that it is, not knowing or expecting what will happen next.
To enter the portal to true ecstasy, savor each magical moment as if it’s never happened before and never will again. Enjoy each lovemaking experience like a luscious ripe summer fruit or ice cream cone, an erotic and emotional exploration dripping with sweetness and possibility… whether it’s slow and tender… or fast and wild… or any flavor of your sexual expression in between… whether you’re by yourself or with a lover!
Did you know there’s a push-button easy way to help yourself and your partner drift into a lovers’ trance to get out of your head and into your body for maximum physical pleasure and heart-to-heart connection? Well, there is. It’s my “Love Unbound” music for lovemaking infused with Auditory Pheromones®. Check it out here.